Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Wonka Bars, Wonka Day!

In honor of what would have been Roald Dahl's 90th Birthday, England is celebrating Roald Dahl Day today! As you know, Roald Dahl is the author of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator, and a slew of wonderful and creepy short stories. I recommend the one about the old woman who kills her husband with a leg of frozen lamb, "Lamb to the Slaughter" and also the one about the woman who jumps off a cruise ship, and waves to some man on the deck while she does, and the man can't really function after that. The name escapes me. I also can't find my copy of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, the book, because in case you haven't heard, my bookshelf is slowly collapsing. The only precaution I have taken is to clear off some of the shelves. So because I can't find the book, I will give you my favorite quotes from the movie. The original of course.

10. Wonka: A little nonsense now and then is cherished by the wisest men.
9. Veruca: You're always making things difficult!
8. Wonka: All questions must be asked in the form of writing.
7. Mr. Beauregarde: Just look what happened to that August kid
6. Mr. Beauregarde: Violet, you're turning violet, Violet.
5. Mr. Salt:What is this? Some kind of funhouse?
Willy: Why? Are you having fun?
4. Mike TV: Dad says I can't have a real gun til I'm older. Right, pop?
Mr. TV: Not til you're 12, son.
3. Wonka: Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker.
2. Veruca: Snozberries? Who ever heard of a snozberry!!?!?
1. Mrs. TV: Where did they come from?
Wonka: Loompaland
Mrs. TV: There's no such place!
Wonka: Sure, there is!
Mrs. TV: Mr. Wonka, I am a teacher of geography...
Wonka: Then you know all about it.

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